Experimental Music Love

July 28, 2008

Some News Items! Or Items of News. Some of Them.

Filed under: Music News — by Free Edinburgh Podcast @ 7:48 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Chris Martin - expressing joy

Chris Martin - expressing joy

I intend to make this a regular feature maybe. Probably twice a week or something sensible like that. Mondays and Thursdays sound good? I thought so.


Coldplay are Number One Again

They are. Still not in many people’s hearts though. But enough people ventured to Tesco (most certainly with the specific intention of buying the album) or downloaded Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends legally from all the various internet places to put it back on top after a week at number two. It may have the most retarded album name since the quite exquisite Understand Your’e Swede (sic) by the enigmatic genius that is Jimmy Jenson, but it doesn’t appear to have put people off from thinking it’s a more worthy purchase than last week’s number one, the esteemed Basshunter. Basshunter is thought to be devastated and is refusing to get out of bed for anything other than a ‘damn funky loop to get me grooves onto’. Unfortunately, DJ Sammy has them all and is refusing to share.


Britney Spears and K Fed Fix Child Woes

At last, the news we’ve all been waiting for. Old battery licker Britney and the second most talented of her exes have come to amicable terms over how best to look after their two young boys, Sean Preston and Jayden James. She gives them lots of money and hardly ever gets to go near them. That seems fair enough to me.

 

Racist News Station Deemed ‘Racist’ by Rapper. Who is Black

Not content with letting the mediocre quality of his latest album sell itself, the actually very good really rapper, Nas, has sparked up controversy (all with its unfortunate publicity as well) by attacking the popular American xenophobic news station, FOX. After apparently collecting 620,000 signatures from visitors to his website accusing FOX of being all racist and such, Nas went upside their heads. “Fox refuse to see the petitions,” said Nas. “But I’ll talk to O’Reilly if he’s man enough to face me.” The O’Reilly in question is not Alfonso Bernard O’Reilly, locater of the wreck of a Stinson Aircraft Company aeroplane in the McPherson Range, Australia in 1937, saving the lives of John Seymour Proud and Joe Binstead, as originally thought, but is instead Bill O’Reilly, host of FOX’s The O’Reilly Factor – like X Factor, but for racists. It’s yet to be seen if O’Reilly is indeed man enough to face Nas, but surely his manliness is already assured with his blind patriotism and threats to lynch Barack Obama’s wife.

 

There’s No Other Way to Say This, but This is a Low for Blur Drummer as Girls and Boys Deem Him a Charmless Man who Now Faces Only Coffee and TV in His Country House After Failing to Win an Election or Something. Parklife!

Dave Rowntree, of the bubblegum forest Rowntrees, has once again failed in a bid to be all serious and political and that. Standing as labour candidate for the Church Street seat in London, Rowntree lost out to confused conservative MP, Mehfuz Ahmed. However, this isn’t the end (of a century) for Rowntree as next year he has been selected as the prospective parliamentary Labour candidate for the Cities of London & Westminster constituency in the next general election, whatever that may mean. He’ll also continue to make delicious chewy sweets.

 

Only One of The Fratellis Likes Meat Pies

Breaking news. More later.

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